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Role Playing Freaks
'Summary' Steve invites Rapper and Lord Tourettes to do some role playing adventures, but Rapper decides to make his own rules. 'Characters' *Rapper *Steve *Lord Tourettes *Holly *Red *Blue 'Transcript' (The Episode begins with Steve climbing a large cliff.) Steve: (reaches the top) Hark! We made it! Soon we shall rescue Princess Holly from the clutches of the evil Red-eth the Third! Rapper: (reaches the top wearing a knight hemet) Seriously, your making this even more boring pet peeve. Lord Tourettes: (jumps to the top) Ooh! Why this place looks absolutely FUCKED! Steve: Right, now we advance to rescue the Princess! (runs off) Lord Tourettes: Splendid! (skips off) Rapper: (grins) I will make my ways to make things more interesting... Steve: Halt men! We seem to have encountered one of Red-eth's minions, THE BLUE TITAN! (cuts to Blue in a knight outfit) Blue: (sighs) They don't pay me enough for this crap. Lord Tourettes: Play along BUTTFUCKER! Blue: (sighs and wields his sword) Stand down you fools! You shall not pass for I will- (Rapper throws a rock at Blue.) Blue: The fuck? Rapper: You seem to be taking extreme damage pussy. (throws another rock) Blue: What the fuck are you doing?! Rapper: Throwing rocks, if you get hit, you lose health. Lord Tourettes: Ooh! Splendid! Then the heroes will FUCK over the villains! (laughs and throws rocks at Blue) Steve: Oh my god. This is a joke right? Blue: STOP THROWING ROCKS AT ME YOU IDIOTS! (Rapper punches Blue) Rapper: Aaaand he's down for the count. Blue: Aaah fuck. (dissapears) Steve: Hey you can't just hit them! Use strategy! That isn't fair! Rapper: Your FACE isn't fair. Lord Tourettes: Let's throw more DICKS! (skips off) Steve: (bored tone) You've got to be kidding me right? (They reach a large cavern.) Steve: Halt! It's the Dragon's Cavern! Lord Tourettes: (wide-eyed) Th- The what?! (A large dragon flies out and lets out a huge roar.) Lord Tourettes: (screams in fear) Don't FUCK me! Rapper: (pulls a sword out) Oh yeah! Time to slay this beast! Steve: Wait! Use strategy! That's what Role Playing is about! Rapper: Fuck you. (jumps up at the dragon) Lord Tourettes: And then the Dragon dissapears and never returns again!! (shivers) (The Dragon explodes, sending blood everywhere.) Rapper: Aww sweet! (drinks blood) Nice going L.T. Steve: L.T.! That's cheating! Lord Tourettes: I was scared FUCK! Steve: (sighs) Alright I'll let you do that just one. Rapper: Or more. Steve: No! This has to be fair! Rapper: Hey, who came up with this dumb idea? Steve: I DID! Rapper: Why? Steve: I was bored okay? (rolls his eyes) God, don't you know anything about fun?! Rapper: Yes. (shoots an ogre off-screen) I LIVE the fun, pussy. Lord Tourettes: OOOH! I never knew killing would be fun! Rapper: Uhh, never try it L.T. Lord Tourettes: (pulls out a map) And we advance to Red-eth's PENIS castle! Steve: Aaah! Where we rescue the lovely Princess Holly! Rapper: This guy has problems. (They head inside) Steve: Whoa! Look at these huge stairs! It could take hours for us to climb this thing. Rapper: Fuck... Lord Tourettes: We could use the ele-'FUCKER!' Steve: But it won't work that way L.T. Rapper: So what? We can only climb the stairs? Steve: YES! (begins going up the stairs) Lord Tourettes: (cries) It's going to take FUCKING months! Rapper: Then you and I will take... (pulls out a map and reads it) A teleportation to the top floor! (They teleport to the top floor.) Lord Tourettes: YIPEE! We made it to the COCK floor! Rapper: (reads the sign) Hmm, floor 99? Heh, it'll take hours for Steve to get up here. (3 HOURS LATER) Steve: (comes up to the 99th floor puffing) Man... that... was... a lot... of- (notices Rapper and Lord Tourettes) HEY! How did you guys get up here before me?! Rapper: We used teleportation. Steve: But that's ch- Rapper: (puts a hand on Steve's mouth) Ah, ah, ah. It isn't cheating when we read it from the map. Steve: AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME?! Rapper: Nope. Steve: (sighs) Let's just go and rescue the princess. (They burst into the room Holly is in.) Steve: (gasps) It's the Princess! And Red-eth is in her way... Red: (laughs evily) You won't stop me! These boobs will be MINE! Holly: Gross! Steve: Do not worry fair maiden! My team will- (notices Rapper is gone) Rapper? RAPPER?! (Rapper is peeing on Red, who is knocked out.) Rapper: I needed to go anyway. Holly: EEEEEWWWWW! Steve: RAPPER! WHAT THE HELL?! Rapper: And now this lame game is over. Holly: He's right! This WAS lame! And I had to see some disgusting things as well! YOU LEFT ME HERE FOR 3 WHOLE FUCKING HOURS! I'm going home! (cuts to the real world, Holly storms outside.) Steve: H- Holly! Wait! (she closes the door) Steve: Aww man. Lord Tourettes: Never fear! There's always next FUCK! (END) 'Poll' What do you think about Role Playing Freaks? Terrible, I hated it. (1/5) It was okay, I guess. (2/5) Good, but not great. (3/5) Now this is cool. (4/5) THIS IS AN AWESOME EPISODE!! (5/5) Category:Episodes Category:May Releases